


A Different Kind of First Time

by WhiskeysWorks



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Blackwatch Genji Shimada, Blackwatch Jesse McCree, Fluff and Smut, It's vague but still, M/M, PIV, Trans Genji Shimada, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-15 20:41:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18677035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiskeysWorks/pseuds/WhiskeysWorks
Summary: Genji went to the gunslinger when he felt like he needed to let off some steam, when he needed affirmation that he was alive and could still feel things. It wasn’t quite the same as when he was human, but Jesse could make it feel close.And close was good enough.





	A Different Kind of First Time

**Author's Note:**

> If you need me to tag anything else, please let me know!

Genji sauntered off the dropship first, fingers on his prosthetic hand flexing as he examined it. There was nothing wrong, he just had to make it look like he was doing something. He didn’t like staring straight ahead when he didn’t have any specific plans, because he’d inevitably end up at the med bay. And the med bay was something that could wait until later. 

He was sick of it, went at least twice a week without missions on top of that. Ziegler was always nice, amiable, did her best to make the check ups short and sweet. O’Deorian was always the one that made him uncomfortable, but she did her job well and in relative silence. 

That was one thing Genji liked about her more than Ziegler. Ziegler wanted to make small talk, get to know him, be friendly. Genji didn’t have friends anymore, and he meant to keep it that way. 

Well, no more friends besides Jesse McCree. Something about the cowboy–be it his wit, charm, or just him treating the ninja like a normal person–got to Genji. He had woven his way into Genji’s schedule, then into his mind, and finally, into his heart. It felt strange, opening up to someone, especially since that someone was Jesse. Flamboyant, kindhearted Jesse. Everyone liked him, and those that didn’t generally just didn’t get along with anyone. 

But Genji had gotten lucky. Jesse was the one who liked him. 

It had been annoying at first, the cowboy’s constant banter and flirty smiles, but Genji had eventually started to look forward to it. Started to cherish each grin and pat on the shoulder, each sweet thing Jesse would say to him. They became more than friends after that. 

Genji went to the gunslinger when he felt like he needed to let off some steam, when he needed affirmation that he was alive and could still feel things. It wasn’t quite the same as when he was human, but Jesse could make it feel close. And close was good enough. 

Sex had been casual–sometimes a necessity–something the both of them could enjoy in their own ways. There wasn’t quite love to it, though. Genji could tell that much, and it wasn’t like he was trying to make it something real special anyways. That was an unspoken agreement between them. The thing they had going on, especially the sex part, was generally just seen as a friend-with-benefits kind of deal. 

Sometimes, it made Genji sad, thinking about that. Jesse was someone he felt he could truly trust, and he wanted him in a way he knew he shouldn’t have. With their job on top of Genji’s condition, and the fact that they were supposed to be professionals in a military op, things like love weren’t really welcome. 

Genji would catch himself wishing it were, though. That was dangerous, but he couldn’t help it. Thinking someone like Jesse–sweet Jesse who always treated him with respect and kindness–to possibly love him back? It was a dream Genji couldn’t help but have. Because he did love Jesse. 

The problem was, he couldn’t. Not here, in this place, nor with the body and mind he had now. He wasn’t ready to love someone, but he did. 

He simply couldn’t help falling in love with Jesse McCree. 

Genji sighed, making his way back to the barracks in silence. He’d clean his weapons, sharpen them, finish his post-mission report, then maybe think about going to the med bay. The ninja went into his room and set down his things. Took off the protective armour he could, showered, then put the mask back on. Dressed in some sweatpants and a jacket. 

He sat on the floor, legs tucked beneath him as he began to diligently clean his katana and wakazashi with practiced, precise strokes. His mind started to wander. Eyes unfocused. A buzzing in his ears started up. Footsteps behind him after what felt like mere seconds startled him back to reality, the ninja whipping around and holding his wakazashi to the intruder’s throat. 

Jesse’s hands raised placidly. He had an almost bored look on his face.

“I thought bein’ a bit louder with my steps would’ve warned you.”

Genji lowered the wakazashi, stance relaxing.

“I was not paying attention. Forgive me.”

“Nah, you’re fine. I shoulda seen it comin’.” Jesse shrugged, hands slipping into his hoodie pocket.

“You should not even have to worry about getting a knife to your neck with a teammate, a friend…” Genji murmured, setting his wakazashi back on its stand. He was unsure what to do with his hands now that they were empty, eyes cast downwards.

“It comes with this line of work, Gen. I used to do it too. Hell, I still sleep with my hand on my gun, even here.”

“But at least you know how to tell friend from foe.”

“So do you. It’s not a big deal, Gen. I just wanted to check up on you after I heard you got back from the mission. How’d it go?” Jesse asked, sitting on the bed crosslegged, hands resting behind him to support the lean of his body. 

Genji took the unspoken invitation to sit next to him, appreciating the easy change of subject. He curled his knees to his chest, chin resting on top of the hard metal. Couldn’t feel it through the mask. It bothered him, but he was used to ignoring it.

“It was boring. Nothing happened. We were in and out. I suppose it went well.”

“You suppose?”

“I mean, yeah. It did.” Genji muttered, eyes flicking to his pillow.

“Did somethin’ bad happen?”

“No. Just boring.”

Jesse hummed, then reached out and cupped the back of Genji’s head. His fingers slipped into the still damp spikes of the ninja’s hair.

“Well, I’m glad you’re back safely. I missed you.”

Genji allowed himself to be pulled forward into an embrace, closing his eyes when he was wrapped in Jesse’s arms.

“Missed you too.” He whispered, barely audible. The cowboy’s hands squeezed him lightly, so Genji guessed he caught it.

“I can’t get you outta my head, you know that? I was worried about you the whole time you were gone. It’s too quiet without you.”

“I hardly say anything.” Genji scoffed, though he felt warmth in his chest. Warmth that needed to be snuffed out before it was too late.

“No. You say a lot. You say it with your eyes, the little things you do with me, the way you hold yourself when we’re…Yanno. Together.” Jesse mumbled against the ninja’s temple. 

Genji frowned and pulled back, blinking a few times.

“What are you trying to say…?”

“I dunno, I just—I got feelings for you that I haven’t really got a good grasp on yet, but I know that they’re real, and they’re important to me. You’re important to me. Gen, you—We…” Jesse trailed off. Genji was surprised. It wasn’t often that the cowboy was at a loss for words. 

He tilted his head, taking Jesse’s hand in his human one. Looked into Jesse’s honey-brown eyes.

“I think…I think I understand what you are trying to say.”

Jesse’s brows furrowed as Genji took off the mask, setting it aside and putting both his hands over the one in his hold.

“You are important to me as well, Jesse. Important in a way I…It’s not something I am used to anymore. Not something I expected would be returned, certainly—”

Genji cut off abruptly as Jesse raised his free hand to cup his chin, encouraging him to look up. He did. Jesse was smiling in that way that made Genji feel special. Warm. Human.

“You’re beautiful.”

Genji’s eyes flicked to Jesse’s lips, then slipped shut again as those lips met his own. He slowly dropped back onto the bed, Jesse leaning over him, pressing his body down, following him. The kiss didn’t break until they needed air, their shared breaths hot. 

Genji stared up at Jesse a moment, then wrapped his arms around his head and shoulders, bringing him down again. The warmth in his chest turned into a simmering burn, a fire stoked to life again from dying embers. The cowboy’s body was pressed to his in a firm line, warm and heavy and alive. Burning just like Genji’s was. 

Their kisses turned messy, the ninja’s lips parting as he tilted his head, Jesse slipping his tongue past the seam of his lips, dipping and tasting and taking. Genji loved the feeling. He loved how it reminded him of his old self. He loved that it was Jesse above him, kissing him breathless and slipping his hands underneath his jacket to explore. He loved…

Genji sighed into Jesse’s mouth, his hands fumbling to unzip his jacket and slip out of it. Jesse hummed, kissing Genji deeply before moving his lips down. Down his neck, his arm, his chest. Biting, marking, sucking. Genji pushed into the treatment, head tossed back, hands tangling in Jesse’s hair. It was soft. 

The ninja gasped, grit his teeth. Closed his eyes as Jesse’s hand pushed one of his legs up, kisses being peppered all over it. He pressed a hand to Genji’s lower stomach, his thumb rubbing little circles that Genji could only feel the pressure of. 

He wished he could feel the roughness of it, the way it would tickle his real skin. But this was good enough. Jesse’s mouth on his neck and shoulder was enough to make up for it. Jesse was more than enough. 

Genji slowly opened his eyes, head tilting so he could see the cowboy. Jesse had a flush covering his cheeks, down his neck and disappearing into his hoodie. He dragged his nose up to Genji’s jaw, making him shiver. 

One metal and one human hand slid up the cowboy’s back, hugging him closer. The ninja’s lips pressed against Jesse’s temple, and he felt that hand on his stomach slide lower, lower. Genji’s legs spread easily. Giving in and letting Jesse have all of him felt like more than just an affirmation now, more than just a quick fuck to get the urge back to manageable. It was trust in the man above him. Trust that he would take care of him and make him feel things he hadn’t even experienced when he was fully human. 

He loved Jesse. Genji loved him. 

Clothes were quickly removed, the bed bouncing a bit when their combined weight was pressed back into it, Genji panting into Jesse’s mouth again. Kissing him, holding him, inviting him to do more. His legs were pushed to the side, spreading more as Jesse’s hand slipped between them, fingers working over the places he knew would make Genji writhe. 

The ninja did, his back arching up with a soft moan as two fingers breached him, Jesse’s thumb rubbing slow and practiced over his most sensitive area. Genji watched Jesse’s face, the way his eyes were blown, narrowed, focused completely on him. Those eyes flicked up. 

Genji moaned again, mouth opening and closing a bit as he tried to speak. Tried to say what he meant in a way that wouldn’t break anything between them.

“Jess…Jesse?” He whispered, the cowboy looking up, hands slowing.

“Yeah?”

Genji hesitated, then reached up and threaded his fingers back into Jesse’s hair.

“Take your time.”

Jesse paused, brows furrowing a bit. Then, he smiled, so softly, pressing a little kiss to Genji’s inner wrist.

“Alright.”

The answer spoken as a breathless promise. Understanding, completely. 

Genji wondered if Jesse loved him back. 

The cowboy teased him with kisses and licks, worked him into a mess that coated his fingers and thighs, dripped onto the sheets below them. Genji could feel the way Jesse’s erection pressed to his thigh. Again, he wished he could feel more than just the pressure. And again, Jesse being the one above him made it more than enough. 

Genji was gasping and moaning with every other breath, stomach tense and hips pushing up in anticipation, for more. He needed more. Jesse gave him more. Pressed his crown to Genji’s entrance, pushed in with a surprisingly gentle shift of his hips, dragging Genji’s legs up to his shoulders. Kept pushing in, hair a tangled mess, eyes squeezed shut in pleasure. 

Genji held him, touched him where he could, arched against him. Both gasped when he bottomed out. Genji felt full and warm, warmer than he had any right to. Jesse shifted, began to move, slow and controlled. Taking his time. 

Genji tossed his head to the side, bit his lip, begged for more, faster, with his body. But he didn’t want it to be fast. He didn’t want it to be rough. Not this time. And it wasn’t. 

Jesse moved in deep, kissed the ninja even deeper, hands spreading and moving over Genji’s body that felt far too much like worship he didn’t deserve. It only added to the warmth. Genji pushed into all Jesse gave him, felt him everywhere he could with his hands, his lips. Even as the pace quickened, as the heat in Genji’s stomach coiled and tightened, it still felt gentle. 

Genji was quieter, for once. Just breathy moans and quiet whispers of Jesse’s name passing his lips. He didn’t feel like he needed to be loud to be noticed, not now. Not with that warmth burning in his chest brighter, brighter the more he felt Jesse, the closer he got. 

He felt alive in a way he never had before. And it felt good. 

He wanted to be alive, even with the way he was, with the body he had. 

Genji’s hand slipped between them, Jesse’s hips meeting his own in quick, short thrusts. He hesitated again. The cowboy’s hand joined his own, squeezed it, then pushed it aside. Genji let him. His touch was far better than Genji’s own hand could ever be. 

Deft movements, two fingers rubbing over him, fast. Stars exploded behind Genji’s eyes, back arching and body tensing as his orgasm ripped through him. Jesse kept working him through it, made the quivering of his stomach tense and jump sharper, making the feeling last longer. He felt warmth bloom inside him, Jesse cursing and groaning. His weight fell onto Genji, welcome and warm. 

The ninja relaxed and shifted to get comfortable, closed his eyes, turned his face to push it against Jesse’s temple. Kissed his cheek. He felt…

“Love you, Gen.” Jesse murmured, Genji feeling the way the words formed against his neck. The warmth in his chest made a smile grow on his lips.

“Love you too, Jess.”

For once, Genji didn’t feel like he had to leave the embrace. And he didn’t.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! ;)


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